Why do you care so much about my sexuality?

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Why is sexuality still such a big deal? How on earth does my homosexuality affect your life? Why do people get so heated up about this topic? It really doesn’t matter, people! Live and let live. I understand people give religious and cultural reasons for being against any kind of sexuality other than hetero. But why? What is the logical reason for this protest? And in any case, there are so many religious and cultural dogmas that have become obsolete because they no longer make sense; why are people still clinging to this belief that monogamous heterosexuality is the only acceptable behavior for all people in the world?

Maybe the original reason for prohibiting any kind of non-procreative sexuality had to do with promulgating the human race in a time when we needed as many progeny as possible. Or maybe it was about making sure your family line was continued for both genetic and dynastic reasons. Sociologists and cultural anthropologists could probably list hundreds of theories around this subject, and maybe some of those theories made sense to a particular people in a particular time. However, in today’s world, there is simply no sensible argument for restricting human sexuality.

Is Jim worried that Joe is going to sexually harass him at work? Is Carla afraid to share a locker room with Joanne? Just because Joe is bisexual does not mean he is going to attack everyone in the office. Just because Joanne is a lesbian doesn’t mean she is going to sit on a bench and ogle all the women in her gym while making lewd gestures. Of course there are hyper-sexual people throughout the world who are aggressive and abusive. That is true no matter what your sexual identity is. I think the number of heterosexual rape and sexual harassment cases can attest to that fact. And, yes, laws and regulations must exist to deal with those perpetrators regardless of their sexual identification. While I’m certainly not condoning complete sexual anarchy, I am arguing against all those who are so adamantly against consensual sexual acts among adults that do not conform with their own personal, narrow belief systems.

I am actually intellectually curious as to why so many cultures have evolved into a very strict, puritanical approach to sexuality, but the bottom line is that sexuality is just not that big of a deal. Sex is fun. Sex feels good. Yes, there are consequences, both physical and emotional. As rational adults, we need to be aware of those consequences. We need to be educated. We need to be emotionally mature enough to make decisions based on logic and not libido. We need to be honest with ourselves and those with whom we are in relationships. We need to understand what “consensual” means and never cross the line of forcing anyone into something they do not want.

When all of that has been achieved, no one should have the right to decide who gets to have sex with whom. If you want to have a monogamous relationship with someone of the opposite gender for the rest of your life, that’s wonderful! There are plenty of people in the world who want the same thing. Go for it! If you want something else, that’s wonderful! There are plenty of people in the world who want the same thing. Go for it! And if you have a problem with that, just go about your day as usual and — guess what? — it really won’t make a bit of difference.


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